Mostly True Stories (1996)
Open Book
I am an open book, just look into my eyes, it's not so hard to see
It's just a short trip down, down into my soul, to get to the heart of me
I am an open book, always was and will be, I've worn my heart on my sleeve
But it got tossed around, till one day I found, that it was gone from me
Chorus 1
Now there's blood on my sleeve where my heart used to be
She came along and she made history, she took from me every dream I ever had
Walked away, left behind this shell of a man, without a heart left to me
So I stumbled 'round in the pouring rain, trying to see what my life means
Picking up the pieces, fallen to the ground, of a broken heart and forsaken dreams
I found that all my dreams were made for loving her, I had not one to claim for me
It's a very dark road to climb out of that hole, when your love sinks deep
CH1
Now I begin to try to learn to live again, I ask you to come with me
There's a place I know where we can sit and talk, won't you come and see?
'Cause I am an open book, questions fill your eyes, I know you want to ask me
When will I love again? I tell you when I find, someone I trust will see
Chorus 2
She will love me for me, she'll let me be
She'll take from me only what she needs
She'll hold me for me and then she'll see
How easy it could be, to pin that heart back on my sleeve
Gentle Winds
Walking down this city street, my whole life in front of me from here
Trying to learn from where I've been
Lots of lessons learned traveling down the road away from her
I never thought the day would come, when I'd want to live without her
It took a long time to finally see, lots of time and loneliness
Learning how to be alone, now I live and wait to feel
Chorus
The gentle winds of love again, floating down from high
From a clear blue sky
The gentle winds of love again, oh when will I see when love will come to me
Through the gentle winds of love
When I see you then I'll know, the soft fragrance through the breeze
That blows your life into mine, until then I'll be working hard
Preparing for another start, the chance to love again
Then never will another day come when I'll want to live without you
It takes a long time to finally see, lots of time and loneliness
I learned how to be alone, now I live and wait to feel
CH
Through the gentle winds of love
Through the gentle winds of love, you'll come to me
Through the gentle winds of love, you'll come to me
Expectations
When I look into your loving eyes, I can see the reflection
Of a man you think you see in me, there's no doubt of your perception
You're reading so much more in me than I ever have expected
And you know it breaks my heart to see your expectations unrequited
Chorus 1
No one could live up to the image of that shadow
It's like a specter in your dreams
The shining knight riding a horse of white
To sweep you off your feet, it's not me
This comedy of miracles has left you in the dust
When the rains come dust turns to mud and you're mired in it now
Oh I wish that I could make you see how I'd love to be the one
But I only know how to be the me that I am and always was
Chorus 2
How can one hope to meet all the expectations of the lovers we perceive
For the ones that we will want to hold in the twilight of this scene
CH1
House of Rhapsody
The people come to hear the music, they come to forget about their failures
And to ease the pain of living in this life
Some are looking for a message to let them know everything's going to be alright
We're all looking for peace of mind, you know it's always so hard to find
The people come to hear of romance, they want to hear of love that's working
And to hear of the times when love just didn't fly
They want to hear a passion story of how love goes and to know the reason why
We're all looking for peace of mind, you know it's ever so hard to find
Chorus
I have found my heart in this haven, it has come back to me
From the depths of where it was driven, now it strives to be free
I have found it here in this haven, where the love flows free
In the warmth of the stage lights glowing from the heavens down to me
It is warm inside this house of rhapsody
Repeat Verse 1, Bridge, and Chorus
Melissa and Michael
Melissa is my daughter
She's got red hair and a personality to match
Sometimes dark, sometimes fiery, but always she's my love
I love to sit with her at her little table
For a spot of tea and childlike conversation
Melissa's mind is sharp, she knows her dolls
But she's happy playing with matchbox cars
And the train I bought, for her last birthday
Is still the best toy she ever found
She's my daughter, and I love her so
Couldn't live without her, I hate to see her grow
Michael is my son
So much like me it scares me half to death
Same kind of shy, loner kid I was, with a smile that lights the world
He can hit a ball so far, I have to race to catch it
And he runs so fast, I can't keep up with him
Michael rides his bike to the train tracks, and back home several times a day
The engineer waves, and throws him candy while the train goes on it's way
He's my son, and I love him so
Couldn't live without him, I hate to see him grow
Now if you know me well, then you must know I have no kids of my own
They were planned for later, later never came, now they live just in my dreams
They'd be my kids, and I'd love them so, I live without them now, I'll never see them grow
(2 times)
Snow Day
It's late the night before the day I say hello to her
I've watched her image every day in school
She caught me looking at her once, I quickly looked away
Like I had violated some unwritten teenage rule
Her friend Kristie said, "Why don't you go talk to her?
Oh, she likes you, don't you know?"
But trying to get your courage up when you're only 12 years old
Is like trying to stop the winter skies from snow
Chorus
So I'm looking at the moon tonight out my bedroom window
With hands folded, I kneel down to pray
Oh God, please make it snow tonight, at least 10 or 12 inches
So tomorrow school'd be canceled, saved by a snow day
Now I know that this is all a part of learning and helps me grow up to be strong
But why is it, lessons learned come so slowly and why we so often think that we are wrong?
But I guess tomorrow I'll have to take my chances, that I'll live through this and go on
'Cause there isn't one damn cloud in the sky tonight
It's going to take divine intervention for it to snow
CH
(Spoken)
Dear God, I'll do anything you say, just give me this one request
Please make it snow tonight, I'll never ask for anything else ever again
(Sung)
So tomorrow school'd be canceled, saved by a snow day
So long
It was nighttime, I was grounded, had this hollow ache, my heart was pounding
And the rush of the wind through the trees, in the forest was chilling me
I was dreaming, I was flying, then a face appeared, oh what are you doing here?
On the steps, in the hallway, through the room, in the doorway, I'm not ready
Chorus
I don't want to leave this precious home, to put out on my own
Don't want to lose the love I've known, so long
In the courtroom, with the man there, looking down at me with a cold stare
"Is it true, is she gone, will she never come back?", I said, "No sir"
Then I walked out, with a shadow, it was trailing me like a moonglow
And I looked to the sky and I asked, "Dear Lord, where do I go now?"
CH
Bridge
So long to the times we've known, and where have the good times gone
Now comes the time to be alone, so long
In the darkness there's a light there, it's a full moon, it's the night air
And the stars falling down give me reason to smile, I'm still breathing
There is time now for reflection, to look at my life with an introspection
But I live for the time when I find my home, it's gonna be so long
It's gonna be so long, so long
James Dean's Genes
I guess I've led a sheltered life, lo all these years
They tried to keep me from feeling strife, trying to stem my tears
Wouldn't let me try out for the team, "You're gonna break your leg"
It didn't matter how much I'd plead, or how much I'd beg
I guess I'll never be much of a wild man, they've got me programmed so well
I never learned how to take my chances, strange way to insure I don't go to hell
I've never driven a motorcycle, I guess it's not my style
Fly down the highway, the wind blowing, easing through the miles
No, I just watch those old movies, of Marilyn and James
And when I see old Marlon Brando, it sets me all aflame
Bridge
You know it just might be genetic, at least that's how it seems
No matter how hard I try I guess I didn't get any of James Dean's genes
Chorus
James Dean's genes were too tight for me, his chromosomes just frighten me
Our DNA formed so differently, I guess I blame it all on heredity
So I go on living safely, trying to find my stride
It's kind of boring, never racy, that's my kind of ride
You know I never do miss the spotlight, oh that's not my scene
Yes I live on the conservative side, never in between
BR
CH
Along This Road
I'm lost, got off the trail a little and I can't seem to find my way back
So I'm looking all around me for some familiar sign
I always thought I knew this place like the back of my hand
But now unfamiliar scenery leaves me wondering
Off to the left the cliff reaches high, up ahead the trees are dense
There's a stand of blue spruce and some aspen lining the way
But one of those aspen, it strikes me quite strange
It's miss shapened somehow
Then I see the lightning's handiwork and I know that it's seen brighter days
So I sit down on a boulder to catch my breath and to take a closer look at this tree
When I see a tiny ribbon hanging from a near branch and a heart and arrow carved in deep
With the initials JW and RL, carved with the love only these lovers see
And a feeling overwhelms me, such pure love, but something here still bothers me
The heart was severed perfectly, right down the middle
The lightning bolt had done this deed
And I wondered if I'd ever know just what this means
Like so many other things I can't perceive
Then the boulder I am sitting on seems to rock a bit
So I stand and move it to one side
Underneath I found a rusted locket on a silver chain
And the emotions I cannot hide
When I opened the locket to find what's there I see some words inscripted inside
Inscribed "Love you forever, forever is ours" and my imagination takes me for a ride
I imagine he came back here long after she'd gone and saw the split heart for the first time
Collapsing to the ground, clutching at his heart, just like me he felt it and he cried
I see the both of them when their love was young
With all the hope and promise lying ahead
Planning for a future of unbridled love, leaving nothing left unsaid
But somewhere down the road they walk things just go wrong
No one really knows quite why
Sometimes there's no one to blame for the love that fails, we can only try
So I pick myself up and gather up my stuff and try to figure out which way to go
I put the locket back, I rolled the boulder back in place
To leave this shrine intact and whole
And I wonder why love so often ends up here in an unknown place with nowhere to go
And I touch that little ribbon and resume my search for grace
Along this road I do not know
(3 times)
Carry On
The snow is falling, my love I'm calling, I haven't seen you in a long time
I've missed your smile for quite a while, so hard to live on my own now
Chorus 1
And I wish that I could change things, rearrange things
To let you know the way we might have gone
And I get to wondering sometimes in words that rhyme
How it is I'll come to carry on
I still remember that last December, there wasn't anything we needed
Everyday a lifetime in our joining lifelines, it seemed like nothing's in between us
Chorus 2
But you know if I could change things, the telephone rings
Telling me another lover's gone
And I get to wondering sometimes, in winter sunshine
How it is I'll come to carry on
BRIDGE
You didn't give me the chance I needed to show you I'm your man
All the warning signs went unheeded and how you left I still don't understand
The snow's still falling, and I'm still calling, I won't see you for a long time
I'll miss your smile for quite a while, gotta learn to live on my own now
CH1
And I get to wondering sometimes in words that rhyme
How it is I'll come to carry on
And I get to wondering sometimes in winter sunshine
How it is I'll come to carry on
The Folly of it All
Everything dies in the winter, everything holy goes to hell
Anything left is a reminder of all we've lost, we can't tell, (can't tell)
And when I look into the future I see the promise of all time
Time that's filled with good intentions, I wish that we were not so blind, (so blind)
Blinded by our arrogance, thinking all we do is permanent
Taking all we need for now, death to all that's heaven sent
A world we call ours, attack it with our armament
Never looking back to see the folly of it all
Earthly waters spring from down below, looks so pretty in the mist
But we dare not dive below, we can only reminisce (in the mist)
And this air we're forced to breathe, it's not like we have a choice
Filled with pollutants we could never clean even if we raised our voice
We voice our arrogance, thinking all we do is permanent
Taking all we need for now, death to all that's heaven sent
Trash this world we call our home, who cares about it's detriment
Never looking back to see the folly of it all
How many forests will we clear before we have enough room to live
And who will be left here to mourn, who will be left to forgive, (forgive)
And the species long since passed away, you know they're never coming back
What is the price our children pay for all we make fade to black
Who'll forgive our arrogance, nothing here is permanent
Giving back's the only way to make this earth what heaven meant
A very wise man once said, "Those who don't learn from the past
Are destined to repeat it", the folly of it all...
The Time is Too Short
Here I am, thinking about the two of us again
Wondering if we'll ever win the game or if we'll even ever feel the same
When I see the beginning of another shiny day
The ending of another night with you, every day the world is looking new
Chorus
Don't you know the time is too short, let it flow, the love in your heart
It's time to show, so give up all you can, the time is too short, we must make a plan
If I knew all the words there ever were to say
To tell you how I'm feeling here today I know we would surely find a way
When I see the love that you have given to me
To show the way that I can make you mine and the love I know we're bound to find
CH
CH
Question
In response to your question
I say even though the bloom of romance may whither
Real love survives
And though the fire and the passion may fade
This love never dies
You can hold it in your heart, this love, hold it in your dreams, this love
And forever may it keep you in the glow of it's warmth, my love
Runs With Scissors (1998)
Runs With Scissors
When I was about three year's old I was trying out my new found wings
Anything mama said not to do, well, I just had to try that thing
The time had come to push my limits and it didn't matter what she'd say
That's when I learned how to run with scissors and made my mama's hair turned gray
"You could put out someone's eye with that, not to mention maybe even your own"
I'd hear her cry and then I'd smile, just to listen to my mama's moan
Life on the edge is in my blood, I've been doing it for oh, so long
Almost never even hurt myself, so how could it be so wrong
Chorus 1
I just had to run with scissors, I still do it every chance I get
It's living life out on the edge and I haven't put my eye out yet
There may be a day when I slow down, but until then you have to agree
Everyone's gonna have to put up with it 'cause I've just got to be me
Like the time I met the plate glass window up close and personal
Pieces flying everywhere, where else was my arm to go
Bright red stains on that white towel and a trip to the emergency room
But I lived to run another day always just avoiding doom
Then the time back in junior high we were learning how to vault that horse
It galloped away at an inopportune time, when I was in the air of course
We made another trip to the cast man, they set this one up to the hip
It slowed me down a little for a time but it could not make me quit
Chorus 2
It's funny but when I think of the times in my life when I've been hurt
Broken bones or bleeding skin, tempting fate with disaster I'd flirt
Never once in all my life did I hurt myself running with blades
Kind of makes you sit back and think how much pain I could have saved
Chorus 1
Everyone's going to have to put up with it 'cause it's not easy being me
Colorado
Sometimes late at night the wind picks up and takes me
High up where the snow lives on a mountain
A cabin warmed by fire high on a hillside
Is where my heart lives would you like to see it?
It's the finest place I've known, it's my home
My soul's in Colorado, don't you know?
The winter wind blows cold through the mountain passes
Until the Chinooks come with their warm breezes
The winter chill gives way and life begins a blooming
Even on the high tundra columbine blossom
It's the brightest place I've known, just like a home
I bloom in Colorado, why don't you go?
When spring time comes again, as it always does
The riverbeds rise with the snowfall water
The water's icy cold and rolls past old boulders
Placed in this stream here by some ancient glacier
Now that water moves my soul like liquid gold
It's lovely Colorado, riches untold
And when the fall is here, when the season changes
Cold starts its trek down from the great divide
The aspen leaves change hue all with the first freeze
Mountains turned yellow gold in all their splendor
It's a beautiful sight to see, the yellows and green
The color's Colorado, nature in harmony
It's the color in Colorado, its nature's harmony
I'm Not Drinking Today - Steve Fisher
Well it's hot down here in Texas, looks like summer's come to stay
It seems a whole lot longer than a year I've been away
I've been drinking whiskey since some time last fall
And some days go by in numbers where I don't feel anything at all
And it seems a whole lot longer than a year I've been away
I don't miss you when I'm drinking, I'm not drinking today
Yes it's hot down here in Texas, Texas is my home
You still live in Kansas, we both live alone
I've stood upon the bridge we built looking for a sign
It could fall into the waves below, or stand this test of time
And it seems a whole lot longer than a year I've been away
I don't miss you when I'm drinking, I'm not drinking today
I don't miss you when I'm drinking, I'm not drinking today
Now all that I might tell you, it's just this you need to know
The bridge still stands to bring you home, if that's the way you want to go
But the water keeps on coming, the river's running fast
It could beat against this bridge we built until it falls at last
And it seems a lot longer than the year I've been away
I don't miss you when I'm drinking, I'm not drinking today
I don't miss you when I'm drinking, I'm not drinking today
She Rolls
She rolls, she rolls, oh my that girl she can roll
You give her to set of wheels and down the road she rolls
She's sweet, so sweet, her kisses are such a treat
Like chocolate and whipped cream, she leaves my knees weak, she's sweet
Chorus 1
She gets around pretty well, she's independent you can tell
A lady of good taste and a gentle touch
It's plain to see she cares so much
She drives when we go out, that van it gets her about
She gets on the lift and gets her hand on the shift, and she drives
She's kind, so kind, her attitude is well refined
She never honks her horn or shows the drivers her scorn, she's kind
Chorus 1
We made a run to the fair, we met some animal kids there
She petted a tiger kitten with which she was smitten on this run
We had fun, such fun, but then her batteries were done
She needed some assistance so I pushed her the distance, it was fun
Chorus 2
Now don't you get me wrong when I say I pushed her around
When her batteries are strong she's got the fastest wheels in town
She rolls, she rolls, 0h my that girl she can roll
You give her a set of wheels and down the road she rolls
She rolls, she rolls, she rolls...
I Choose
Here I go to again into the fray, when will I ever learn to stay away
We all make our own choices, and we hope we choose right
Listening to all our voices, trying to guide us through this night
Your smile excites me so, just wish it were for me
'Cause there I would quietly go, become part of your mystery
Like a shadow you came here, like a fog on my sea
I'm a sailor left drifting, there's no harbor for me
Chorus
I need a place to call home, a place of refuge
Cast away on this listless sea with no shoreline in view
We all make our own choices and I choose, I choose
I choose to be in love with you
I've planned many lifetimes with you by my side
Uninhabited shorelines, just you and me and the tide
Yes we make our own choices then we live with what we choose
But if I don't speak of my love now then I surely will lose
Chorus
I choose to love you
Come Home
The wind is chilling on this Christmas Eve, snow is falling on the ground
Friends and neighbors are all gathered here, Christmas cheer is all around
These are times that make our lives worthwhile, spreading love and wishing peace
For hopes and dreams of what our children seek, hoping all their dreams will keep
Chorus 1
Come home to a fire that's always warm
Come home to shelter from the storm
Come home to hugs and kisses sweet
Come home to this place of love we meet
Missing friends of ours who are not here, some have passed and some have gone
Wishing one more chance to whisper love, one more chance to sing their song
Memories have a way of circling you, reminding of good times long past
Feeling love and kindness here and now and trying to make these feelings last
Chorus 1
Chorus 2
Come home to a love that's all around
Come home to a place of higher ground
Come home to smiling faces sweet
Come home to this place of love we meet
The wind is chilling on this Christmas Eve, snow is falling on the ground
Friends and neighbors are all gathered here, Christmas cheer is all around
Christmas cheer is all around
Perfect Love's All in Your Head
So you fell in love, it seems to fit like a glove and it's gonna last forever
Now the fire's bright, the passion feels so right and you see no unhappy endings
It's a mutual thing, it's like moonlight in spring when too hearts beat as one
There's no discontent, just pure nourishment, it's like soul food for the homeless
But there's a trial ahead, perfect love's all in your head
There will come a time, love can turn on a dime and fills your life with questions
Once it seemed so strong, now something's gone wrong and you can't see your own reflection
Like how did you get here in the course of two years from a fire to a dying ember
Did you forget how to love when push came to shove or did you just forget to remember
That's the trial ahead, perfect love's all in your head
Perfect love can break your dreams, it's never quite what it seems
It can't survive all the hype, too much pressure of that type
Mostly crushed by sheer weight or nasty twists of fate
Still don't stop us in our quest for perfect love
There's nothing perfect in life, it's how you deal with the strife
That's how your love will be measured
Now you get your chance to find a true romance or you get to turn and run away
You know it takes hard work to get through this hurt, common ground is hard to get to
Though perfect love is a myth, without work love can't exist
There's nothing in love you won't fight for
That's the trial ahead, perfect love's all in your head
Runs With Scissors II
I handed Sara the scissors to help cut the yarn on the bootie she was knitting for a little one
The scissors fit her delicate hands like they were meant for her
As she carefully cut the loose pieces away
While I watched, the scissors began to glow with an incandescent gleam of pure joy
Like they were finally doing the work they were meant for
Snipping away at fabric and mocking me...
Telling me what the hell were they doing spending most of their life
Just hanging ornamental around my neck
Knowing they had a higher purpose
And just who did I think I was holding them prisoner
Like I'd captured a fairy princess in my nasty tower of tears
With little hope of rescue from my tyranny
When Sara handed the scissors back to this very shocked individual
I pulled my mouth shut and vowed right then and there
Whenever I needed some cutting done
This pair of scissors would be my weapon of choice
And in my own small way, I could keep their loveliness in my life
And also give them back their purpose
And any time I see someone making beauty with their hands
I'll be sure to offer them for the task
And hopefully give them the fulfillment they deserve
Hoping to the Sky
Hey you, I've been watching how your tides ebb and flow
How your flowers bloom and grow, and I've got a feeling, a feeling about you
Hey you, I've been thinking 'bout the way you're moving through
'Bout the way I feel so near to you, and I want to reach out, reach out and touch you
Chorus
But I don't feel I have a right to intrude in your live
I guess I'm hoping for a sign
Maybe a small signal fire inviting me inside
Just that hint of what could be, joining you to me
In a circle so warm
Did I see a twinkle in your eye or am I just hoping to the sky
Hey you, I've been dreaming about holding you so close
It was like holding a ghost, you were a misty, shadow in the light
Hey you, I've been wishing to know everything you know
How you let your innocence flow, if I could feel that again I'd truly be fulfilled
CH
Hey you, I've been wondering if I'm wasting my time
Trying to reach you through a rhyme, am I getting through here? Sure would like to know
Hey you, I've been missing a simple closeness in my life
And I was wondering if you might want to join me in my hoping to the sky
Hoping to the sky, hoping to the sky
Another Casualty of War
I went off into the jungle to serve my country well
Southeastern Asia was all jungle and many of my friends fell
Some were prey for sniper bullets 'cause we couldn't see through the green
Then the choppers brought the cloud down, turned it into a deadly scene
The cloud would kill off all the plant life, so the manufacturer said
Saving countless American boys lives, so the killing cloud was spread
They did not try to protect us from a sickness we can't see
We slept and ate there in that fog, dioxin cloud no one could flee
Chorus 1
It's a different kind of Armageddon now, follows us like a plague
From doctor's offices to hospital beds, another losing war we wage
We fight never ending battles, and we never know what for
Just a way to live a life, another way to live your life
Another casualty of war
When I returned from that jungle to my homestead in the plains
They could see that I had changed some, though I tried to hide my pain
I was sick most of the time now from an unknown disease
But the day my first child was born, reminded me of that killing breeze
This little girl was not born perfect like so many babies are
Twisted back, clubbed foot and a wandering eye, no protection from the harm
She did not fight for her country though her country owes her much
She might as well have been in those trenches, feeling that cloud's cruel touch
Chorus 2
It's a different kind of Armageddon now, follows her like a plague
From doctor's offices to hospital beds, another losing war she'd wage
She fights never ending battles, and she'll never know what for
Just a way she lives her life, another way to live your life
Another casualty of war
Chorus
I Ain't had a good day - George McAlister
My horse throwed a shoe six miles out of Deadwood
And you can't imagine how embarrassed I feel
When a bad gun slinger with the big reputation
Has to walk into town, now that's a hell of a deal
Chorus 1
So you'd better smile when you see me coming
You best tip your hat and get out of my way
Or I might just shoot you and then kick dirt on you
I'm warning you friend, I ain't had a good day
Now it's hard to look mean when you come in a walking
And your black suit's all dusty and your boot shine is gone
And your hair's wet and stringy and you're packing your saddle
And you're hungry and thirsty and tired to the bone
Chorus 2
So pour me a drink and don't ask me no questions
Rent me a room and then show me the way
And if living's to your liking you best not disturb me
I'm warning you friend I ain't had a good day
Chorus 1
I warning you friend, I ain't had a good day
Rain Song
Rain falls on me and it's like we've never met, drops as big as a sea I haven't sailed on yet
Breathing comes so easy when the air is this moist like returning to the fish I might have been
My skin is clammy and dry's a long gone memory, though I'm sure I'll see it again
Rain is so cheap, I've never paid a cent, pure humidity, it's free, there is no rent
I wish that other things in life were as easy to find as the rain that falls on this planet's face
I take work and I work hard in that 9 to 5, I wish I could take a rainfall's pace
Rain cleanses me, it purifys my debt, my joy is plain to see, even though I'm soaking wet
This rain could go on all day, soaking the ground, making all things living turn to green
Life is blooming, life is shouting, trying not to drown, it's the damnedest thing I've ever seen
When will I see the time this rain is spent, Lord hear my plea, I'm so tired of being wet
I know there is a plan to this, the reasons should be clear, though right now it's not so plain to me
I long to see the sun again, or at least a full moon, but in my sight it's clouds and rain I see
Rain falls on me, drops as big as is sea, think I need a rain check on this rain fall
Falls on me, falls on me
I Count You My Friend - Buddy Mondlock
Chorus
I count you my friend, nothing complicated about it
I count you my friend, will this change, I doubt it
I guess I knew you all along even though it ain't been long since we met
But something tells me I'm not wrong, friends like you I don't forget
Have you noticed how the light has changed, a little brighter every day now it seems
I tell you now that's not so strange, it'll look that way shining in our dreams
Chorus
When the going gets a little rough and they're lining up to box our ears
We won't even show them our best stuff, we'll send 'em back with cry baby tears
And when the beauty of this world won't sleep and it tries to wake us up and make us cry
We won't be afraid to laugh and weep, we'll be safe in each other's eyes
Chorus - twice and out
And here's a little teaser from the new CD, "Carpe Piscum - Seize the Fish"... these will be in the liner notes on each song...
Carpe Piscum - Bill Nash - Copyright Putsie Cat Records 2002
As I get older, I come to realize how continually important my friends and family are to me, like without you I would be going nowhere faster than fast! I can't even list you all, I know I'd leave out someone very important, so forgive me in advance. Body parts come and go, abilities mostly fade as age and MS grabs their hold, but I'm always so thankful to still be able to go the last few steps to help a friend up, and vice versa. Please know that if we have spent time together along this road, you have blessed me deeply... the circle grows ever, ever wider!
And please do me a favor... if I don't know you, please come sit and introduce yourself to me at Camp NashBill in the lower meadow at Kerrville and we'll trade songs, laughs and life's finest experiences. If I do know you, come spend some more of your life with me and the Camp NashBill tribe, and continue to be part of this family... may the spirit of Kerrville live forever!!
1. Fireflies - 3 string Shubb capo on the 9th fret - This instrumental came through an experiment, then delight... thanks for the suggestion, Ross, it sounds like fireflies to me, too!
2. Lightning Bugs - When I was a kid, my friends and I basically wiped out the lightning bug species in Illinois (or so I thought), much to my chagrin and continual guilt.
Lightning Bugs - 3 string Shubb capo on the 9th fret
When I was a little kid they told me to go outside
Collect all the lightning bugs, all that I could find
Put 'em in those Mason jars, carefully close the lids
Bring the jars in the kitchen, put 'em into the freezer
They can't live in there, it's not like I don't care, but they tell me they're doing research
They're looking for a cure but I'm not so sure this will bring their breakthrough
So all my friends and I gathered up all our jars
Pulling bugs from the sky, leaving the nighttime dark
We seemed to wipe them out till there was little left
Beautiful fireflies gone, who could forgive this theft of
The beauty of their light, it's darker than darkest night, no more glow on the horizon
How could we kill them off, it seems like such a cost to wipe out an entire species
Bridge
The gentlest bug you've ever seen, I'd let them crawl all over me
They'd make their way to my fingertips, then lift off... their bulbs lit
Now it's 30 years on, I'm driving down this road
Thinking 'bout what we did, how could we be that cold
But look across this empty field, oh what I sight I see
Millions of lightning bugs returning their light for me now
Oh, what a beautiful sight, they come into view so bright, the cornfields are all a blazing
Who could have ever dreamed that we could be redeemed after all this guilt we're still feeling
Well, it just goes to show nature always finds a way
It's bigger than all of us, it doesn't care how we play
They say the more things change the more they stay the same
Lightning bugs came back and I hope they're here to stay
I hope they're here to stay, I never wanted them to go away
They make their way to my fingertips, then lift off... their bulbs lit
3. When I was in Love - My 40's torch song (I'm in my 40s for a couple more years, after all! :) with special thanks to Cliff Eberhardt for different chord suggestions and the fabulous guitar work in Linda Silas' Annex Studio by Rich Prezioso of Small Potatoes when my hands were betraying me! As for the sentiment, what can I say... I'm a closet hopeful romantic!!
When I was in Love - capo 2 -
Intro
Love's a funny thing, sometimes you have it and ignore it
Sometime's it's not around when you need it, but its memory never leaves you
Verse
When I was in love the sun was ever brighter
When I was in love the skies were always clear
When I was in love everything seemed better
Now all I think about is when I was in love
Verse
When I was in love every night was starry
When I was in love the moon was always full
When I was in love life was just a playground
Now all I think about is when I was in love
Bridge
Love gets harder as I get older, so easy to be set in my ways
But I've got a heart that's brimming over
Waiting for the one to open the flood gates
Verse
I want to be in love not for just a moment
I hope to be in love more than for all time
I long to be in love with someone who will love me
Now all I think about is when will it be love
All I think about is when I was in love
4. Mirror Deep - Got this one day sitting at a seemingly continual red light (written completely before I got through the [3 red lights] intersection!), looking in a Gold's Gym... lots of mirrors in there!
Mirror Deep - no capo, standard
Mirrors mark the passing of time, sometimes quick, sometimes slow
But always passing, another wrinkle, another bulge
Oh what's a poor boy to do to keep myself in shape for you?
I don't like wasting time at the gym, the narcissism flowing, and no double chins
The 6 pack stomachs, well defined pecs, oh everyone looks like they're having sex!
Oh when did life get so complex?
Chorus
Mirrors, mirrors everywhere, showing where you've been
Where you're going, no one knows... I think I need an aspirin!
Mirror, mirror on the wall won't show the fairest of them all
Wake up from your long, long sleep, beauty is not Mirror Deep
Time is like a humbling best friend, mirrors keep you honest
No matter how you pretend
Together they lead you through your times
Through the wordless days and the pointless rhymes
To fool yourself is such a crime
The parking lot at the club is always full
They're stressing out their body parts just to be beautiful
I guess they just don't get the point
They're going to die some day, they're going to leave this joint
Oh, time and mirrors just disappoint (repeat chorus)
5. What To Do - In the middle of it, at least I got a good song... oh, for coherency during trial! Thanks to my dear friend Darryl Purpose for the much needed guitar recording during the bad hands-time.
What To Do - capo 8
OK, I'll step out of the way, it seems it's time to go
Still I have to say it was a hell of a ride to get a glimpse of that rainbow
You said, "you never know what's ahead..." and every word you said was true
But today I know it's the end of the line and I'm wondering what to do
What to do with this love, it still lives in my heart
What to do with my time, I don't know where to start
What to do to go on and to do what is smart
What to do with this broken heart
I see all the pieces of me crumbled and strewn around
Now I know it's time to figure it out, to see the truth that I have found
You know this road is going to be slow, but I don't want to leave anything out
'Cause anything left behind will come back around, of this truth there is no doubt
What to do with this love, it still lives in my heart
What to do with my time now that we are apart
What to do to go on, wish I knew what was smart
What to do with this broken heart
What do I do with my broken heart
6. Hubert - Driving to Austin, and clothes strewn all over the side of the road, who else but Hubert?
Hubert - capo 4, DADGAD
Hubert shed his outer skin on the road to Waxahachie
Discarded Dockers out the driver's side window
Left for some hobo's use, though the hobo would never know the story
Of the day Hubert chucked it all
Pathing a new way through his life, void of many of his eccentricities
He'd carried them for so many years in one small gesture, he bid them all goodbye, goodbye
Another mile down the road was Hubert's button down Wall Street shirt
Made of pinpoint cotton in a nice cut
A few feet further was the solid blue tie he used to wear to work
Selling commodities to the other suits
Walking away from the pressure life made up of money and little else
With substance as his only goal,
He wanted help from no one and he was thinking of nobody else (nobody else)
I imagine him now in dusty boots, old jeans and a felt hat
Riding the range chasing dogies down
A million miles from the road to nowhere, now in the middle of nowhere
Straight up in the saddle with a big smile
'Cause this was a life Hubert chose himself and not one prescribed by anyone else
There's something to be said for making your mind,
You never know what you might find when you find your peace of mind (go find)
7. Trick or Treat - True story (sort of) about brothers living in the same room for way too many years.
Trick or Treat - capo 1, standard
Another Hallowe'en is here and I am scared here in my room
My brother's sleeping soundly in the lower bunk bed
And there are shadows all around me and in my head, in my head
I'm usually not afraid of the dark, but something in this room shivers me
I doubt if it's remnants of some poltergeist
Or a spectre of some future body sacrifice, sacrifice
So I pull myself over to the corner of the bed, not knowing what it is I might see
Under my magic covers, somewhat safe from harm here on my mattress sanctuary
I finally get my courage up to peer down from my lofty perch
I'm sure nothing down there's going to get me
No grim reaper, angel of death, no savagery, savagery
But as my eyes adjust to the light I can't believe the sight I see
My brother has an axe deep in the middle of his chest
He's lying in a pool of blood from his open breast, open breast
Then I hear the muffled sound of a disembodied voice
A light giggle and a snickering
He opens his eyes in this horrific scene and says to me
"Trick or treat", trick or treat
8. MFODHB - Don't be scared about the title (rated G), this song is harmless and so much about me it's scary!
MFODHB - Capo 3, standard
How long have you known me now, you'd think you'd have it all figured out
Every time you see me in this corner, guitar in hand there is no doubt
It seems like a part of my body, one of those parts I can't live without
Like I'd stop breathing in a minute if my hands went south
It's pretty plain to see, there's not much to me
There's not much to what you're seeing
I'm a multi-faceted, one dimensional human being
It started when I was 5 years old, they said I was a boy soprano
I got to sing from the front row, crystal clear tone, no vibrato
My pitch was always right on, never needed a falsetto
Then the day came for the change, I spent a long time singing pianissimo
It was still pretty plain to see, this was the life for me
I think you'll have to be agreeing
I'm a multi-faceted one dimensional human being
Bridge
Multi-faceted in that I play more than one instrument
And I sing and harmonize with my voice
One dimensional because all of these are musical
The human being part, I had no choice
Music has always been my friend, best friend a kid ever had
A companion through thick and thin, never ceased to make me glad
It's never been one of my dreams to live a hearty, rich man's life
A good thing too, since there's little chance of getting rich singing every night
But it's simply plain to see, music is big in me
So I will continue to be decreeing
I'm still a multi-faceted, one dimensional human being
I'm a multi-faceted, one dimensional human being...
9. Pig Song - This is absolutely true, and though the pig has physically been recovered since then, it still exists in Patti's closet!
The Pig Song - capo 1, standard
On the shaking bridge over the river in Dubuque in the hallowed land of corn and pigs
We were on our way to somewhere else being passed left and right by big rigs
All carrying pigs to the marketplace, driving them to their final destiny
Links and patties on somebody's plate, carefully packed in the pig factory
Patti caught the eye of one of those porkers, must have looked at her semi sideways
And she realized where they were heading, off to meet whatever maker pigs meet
The tears welled up and fell from her cheeks as she realized the path that they would take
And I knew right then and there, this was a woman with a heart as deep as a lake
CHORUS
One little, two little, three little pigs, all with no future to see
And this girl with a big frown on her raindrop face, sitting on the car seat next to me
Well it took quite some time to quiet her tears down, we stopped for a local ice cream
She cried through 2 scoops of Rocky Road, balancing cone and Kleenex in between
Then we stopped along the way at a shopping mall, looking at all the window-shopping dreams
Till we came to a toy store with a front display filled with stuffed animals like you've never seen
Patti's eyes lit up like Christmas morning with the childlike wonder of her fondest dreams
She pawed through nearly all the animals, like she was looking for the one she'd never seen
Then she found the bulbous body of a pink one, clearly the apple of her eye
And she turned to me, as if to say, "buy this for me and your love will never be denied"
Chorus 2
One little, two little, three little pigs, one with a bright future to see
And a girl with a big smile on her tear stained face, holding the stuffed pig she got from me
One little, two little, three little pigs, sometimes the answer's clear to see
Find a little something makes them happy and you will find a life of harmony
10. Sheldon and Shirley - Yes, my sister still cries when I sing this song (even though she's in her 40s now!), another true story!!
Sheldon and Shirley - capo 3, standard
Sheldon was a stout box turtle, I bought him at the pet shop
Turtles were a dollar and a quarter, and an extra buck bought him a house
He moved around the bowl so slowly, the sanctuary fit him well
With a little greenery and water, he seemed to like his life
One day I came home from school just like every other day
Mom greeted me at the door, with an ashen look, I heard her say,
"Sheldon died today, it was all such a tragic mistake
Your sister, she was curious, she pushed on his shell,
But don't be mad at her, she's only 4"
Shirley was a delicate box turtle, I got her next week at the store
She kept the turtle sanctuary clean, at least for a turtle
She'd wait each day for me to come by, she loved her lettuce and an occasional fly
She moved around the bowl so slowly, she seemed to like her life
But another day I came home from school, there was mom at the door again
With a strange twisted smile, I knew what she'd say but she still said it,
"Your sister did it again, poor Shirley's dead, we'll bury her in the backyard
But don't be mad at her, she's only 4"
The next week at the per shop I got the surprise of my young life
Turned out some researcher found that turtles transmit diseases and the sale of turtles was discontinued,
But I guess it was all for the better, it kept my sister from becoming a serial turtle murderer
The years went by we all got older, but my sister never did get over the guilt
Though I told her it was alright, I forgave her, still fretting over turtles she'd kilt
And I even forgave my mother for insisting I not be mad at a little girl in a frenzy, killing turtles I had had
Now every other year or so I get a package in the mail from that poor, guilt ridden girl,
Still looking for her peace of mind
Now it's turtles everywhere, the stuffed or ceramic kind,
She's still trying to make it up to me, but I don't need a reason to love that girl
Besides I couldn't be mad at her, she was only 4
11. You Teleport Me - Tom Noe owns the largest telescope factory in Wylie, TX, [LTFWT] and I'm quite happy to call him my dear friend!
You Teleport Me - capo 4, standard
I don't understand more than half of what you say, but I like the passion with which you say it
I guess I never was meant to be a deep thinker, but I like to observe your depth
When you tell me of your plans I'm transported with you
To the stars and beyond, galaxies never seen by my eyes
Chorus
Moons hang around planets I see through the lens on your telescope
You expand my horizons (telescopically) in visions I see, you Teleport me
(tag) Though Newtonian physics just mystifies me, I like what I see
I'll never know how to talk to you about this, but I love to hear your voice
When you wax rhapsodic of black holes, constellations and super novas
Part of me really doesn't even want to know, I like to look at it innocently
Besides I wouldn't want to deprive you your chance to try to teach me something I don't know
CH
Bridge
Now you know I don't know about mirrors or power
I don't know the difference between refractors and reflectors
Barely know who Newton was, except for some apple thing
I guess I didn't study hard enough, I just wanted to sing
You strap it on back of you motorcycle, take it everywhere you go
Just in case you get a glimpse of sky on some dark and cloudless night
Me, I'll still be singing of the stars, not really wanting to know details
I trust there're others more competent to keep all that for posterity (CH)
12. Epitome of Feminine - The day I met the first one...
Epitome of Feminine - capo 1, dropped D
She's wearing that dress, I hope for me, you know the one
The blue flower print down to her knees, my heart weighs a ton
With raven black hair in a natural curl, falls all around
And brown eyes so deep I have to stare, look what I found
And I wonder what would happen if I sang her a song
Would she even care to notice, would she try to sing along?
I wonder where she's going, I'd like to find out where she's been
There's something here worth knowing, the epitome of feminine
So I sit down to sing the song, you know the one
The song about love lost over the years, long said and done
She's watching me sing, I close my eyes, can't bear the heat
Oh I wish she would come along through bittersweet
And I wonder what would happen if I stole a goodnight kiss
Would she even care to notice the subtle tremble on my lips
And would I still taste her breathing, would my face still hold this grin
Or would it fade after my leaving, she made me feel so masculine
I wonder where she's going, I'd like to find out where she's been
There's something here worth knowing, the epitome
She's my epitome of feminine
13. Now it's Gone - Dedicated to my ex brother in law, trying to cheat death the only way he knew...
Now it's Gone - capo 1, standard
When I hit the pavement I said, "well, that's that for me now,
Couldn't have survived that fall"
A fog came up around me, bright lights and an airy feeling
A blissful moment of not caring about what happens next
Chorus
Too bad I couldn't (maybe I could) find this feeling without (before) expiring
Way before my (there's still) time, I might add
More or less in (this is) the prime of a (my) dull and dreary life
Though it was (It's) a life, nonetheless... now it's (It's not) gone
If only I would have considered what was important to me when I was alive
I would have been more passionate about all the things I loved to do
About all my interactions with everyone around me
About the single moments I fluffed off without thinking
CH
Bridge
Don't cry for me, I guess I did all I wanted
At least that's what I tell myself now
In this life you take your chances of what to blow off and what to not
Then you play the cards that you were dealt
Wait, what's happening now, I'm riding in an ambulance
Heading to Mercy General, tubes sticking out every which way
Some Angel of mercy's trying to jumpstart my heart, get me to continue breathing
Maybe there's a chance that I might get a chance for a new start (CH)
14. River Dreams - A song about how love sometimes flows away...
River Dreams - standard, 3 capos [ask me...]
I remember the feel of you laying next to me, in mutual satisfaction for all the world to see
As if the universe slowed to acknowledge our presence, as if it might last a lifetime
I remember talking for hours and hanging on every word you'd say
As if it were my lifeblood streaming from your mouth to my soul
A joyous water flowing over an ageless riverbed
Chorus
But like water always moving in a constant forward motion, you weren't long to stay
Off to the next adventure where the river bends forever, nothing in your way
And my raft about to topple through the rolling rapids of a swollen stream
I hope for calmer water up ahead... river dreams
Bridge
In my dreams I still see all the possibilities of every moment we might have shared
Thrown caution to the wind, regardless it might end, oh, where it might have gone had we dared
Now it's only just a dream
But I'm left here wondering why love, like a river, always flows away
Now the riverbed is dry, as are my wings to fly, I'll lift off now, this love is done
I'll remember always the times we shared, I may even forget how things went bad
And I'll revel in our love, however fleeting, and I will see you again... river dreams
Bridge2
But like water always moving in a constant forward motion, we aren't long to stay
Off to the next adventure where the river bends forever, nothing in our way
And the raft about to topple through the rolling rapids of a swollen stream
We hope for calmer water up ahead, river dreams
I hope for calmer water up ahead, river dreams
15. All By Design - Written on Tom and Linda's couch real early one post-house concert morning...
All By Design - capo 3
It's a lonely morning this morning, I'm in my place, the place I have to be
It was another fine night of coffee and song, and not nearly enough sleep
The company was precious and joyful, the music still echoes in my mind's ear
And I'd trade all my chances for fortune and fame just to hold what I've felt here
CHORUS
It's nirvana, utopia, whatever you say, human thoughts of a heaven on earth
Wherever I go, whatever I do, it goes with me what this night was worth and
Regardless which crossroad I come upon next, which barrier to my peace of mind
I will hold this moment of cheer in my heart and trust it was all by design
I wish I could share what this feels like, to be accepted so full and so free
With so many people out searching for whatever is meant to be
And most will never find happiness, even though it's there all around
Found in circle's of friendship like this, the infinity of love's higher ground
CH
I will hold these moments of cheer in my heart and trust it was all by design
16. Painted Ponies - My song dedicated to some of my acquaintances who have chosen to go to the other side early
Painted Ponies - 4 capos, DADGAD [ask me!]
I never saw her, she stepped out from behind the semi trailer
The thump and blood, a lifetime wasted
Her defining moment, I never wanted to see
Her open eyes looking back at me
The note tucked in her pocket to let the world know
That I was not the culprit, to take what she let go
She was crazy for release, she left me in this hell
I'll see her face forever in her final yell
Chorus
Life turns on dimes and carousels, spinning choices and blunt farewells
Around in circles, don't go nowhere, painted ponies they just don't care
I can't stand to live this way, the quality is gone
With no end to my suffering, I cannot go on
The sun it never rises, the flowers never bloom
And there's no doubt in my mind, I'll never leave this room
So I made the call out to doctor K
Could he maybe give him something to relieve this pain
Not for just an hour, but maybe for all time
Could you help me take my life, the choice is mine
CH
Now there've been some times in my time on earth
That I've had to think about it, what is this life worth
And could there come a day I could take no more
Would I reach the same conclusion, close that door
But I wasn't in their skin, I didn't feel their loss
I never bore the weight of their massive cross
But I respect the fact they chose to take
Control of their choice's, anything else is a mistake
CH
17. Come Home (to Kerrville) - This is a rewrite of my Christmas song with the Kerrville Folk Festival in mind (thanks for the suggestion, Charlie Stewart!)
Come Home
The wind is whispering and the sky is clear, stars are littering the ground
Friends and neighbors are all gathered here, listen closely to the sound
These are times that make our lives worthwhile, spreading love and wishing peace
For hopes and dreams of what our loved one's seek, hoping all their dreams will keep
Chorus 1
Come home to a fire that's always warm
Come home to shelter from the storm
Come home to hugs and kisses sweet
Come home to this place of love we meet
Missing friends of ours who are not here, some have passed and some have gone
Wishing one more chance to whisper love, one more chance to sing their song
Memories have a way of circling you, reminding of good times long past
Feeling love and kindness here and now and trying to make these feelings last
Chorus 1
Chorus 2
Come home to a love that's all around
Come home to a place of higher ground
Come home to smiling faces sweet
Come home to this place of love we meet
The wind is whispering and the sky is clear, stars are littering the ground
Friends and neighbors are all gathered here, look at all the love we've found
We all know we're homeward bound
Thanks: To Patty (that name just seems to always keep coming up for me in this life! :) - you are a very lovely person and I'm glad you were so forward (and I'm very proud to call you my wife!)! -- Linda for her un-die-ing patience with me and with her beau... very admirable. -- To Tom for being the most supportive human being I've come across in my travels... may your faculties outlive your need for them! -- To Cary for occasionally sharing those lovely girls with me and to her Caroline for being my special mermaid! -- To Hannah for calling me on the phone when she's sick because she misses me... -- To Joseph and all the volunteer gang at Uncle Calvin's Coffeehouse, where this journey seemed to begin... thanks for travelling with me! -- And to my dear Putsie Cat for her long journey through 17 and a half years with me... always so missed!!
This album is dedicated to the memory of the wonderful songs and humanity of Dave Carter, and my continual hope for Tracy Grammer to continue to make music in this world... we need your energy! And to my dear friends Jim Ross, Kirk Edens and Bob Oldenburg who passed into the next world all too soon... you are also missed!!!
All songs (C) Copyright Putsie Cat Records
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